Nothing really happened today. I got up and went to work. My boss was actually in the office today so I wasn't as lonely. And she brought her baby in and who doesn't like to sit and look at babies?
Last night I took two Effexor instead of just one. I don't know if it is fast-acting enough to have that quick of an affect, but I didn't feel as completely terrible today.
I went to bed at about 9pm last night and then woke up again at 12:45 feeling pretty wide awake, and my brain was straight ON. So I took an Ativan and actually finally removed my fingernail and toenail polish. I don't know if I've ever waited so long to take care of my fingernails and toenails after a manicure or pedicure. That's super indicative to me that I'm losing the ability to actually take care of myself hygienically. Which is really, really bad.
There are a lot of things I could write about tonight. I could write about where I stand on relationships - and how hard it's been for me to revive an old friendship with someone who has romantic interest in me. I could write more about the duality of being a sick/healthy person. I could write more about feeling lost, and why I feel like I've lost direction in my life. I could write about my goals and dreams. I could write about why I feel like I will never attain my goals and dreams. I could write about why I miss The Ex so much, and why I can never be with him again. I could write about the guy that I might have had something with, but he turned out to be a total whackadoo. I could write about how hard it is to have one of my closest friends not understand or be able to handle what I'm going through.
But I don't feel like writing about any of that tonight. I feel like watching the rest of New Girl and The Mindy Project and letting my brain have a break.
Last night I took two Effexor instead of just one. I don't know if it is fast-acting enough to have that quick of an affect, but I didn't feel as completely terrible today.
I went to bed at about 9pm last night and then woke up again at 12:45 feeling pretty wide awake, and my brain was straight ON. So I took an Ativan and actually finally removed my fingernail and toenail polish. I don't know if I've ever waited so long to take care of my fingernails and toenails after a manicure or pedicure. That's super indicative to me that I'm losing the ability to actually take care of myself hygienically. Which is really, really bad.
There are a lot of things I could write about tonight. I could write about where I stand on relationships - and how hard it's been for me to revive an old friendship with someone who has romantic interest in me. I could write more about the duality of being a sick/healthy person. I could write more about feeling lost, and why I feel like I've lost direction in my life. I could write about my goals and dreams. I could write about why I feel like I will never attain my goals and dreams. I could write about why I miss The Ex so much, and why I can never be with him again. I could write about the guy that I might have had something with, but he turned out to be a total whackadoo. I could write about how hard it is to have one of my closest friends not understand or be able to handle what I'm going through.
But I don't feel like writing about any of that tonight. I feel like watching the rest of New Girl and The Mindy Project and letting my brain have a break.
Giving yourself a break is in order. I hope you are feeling better soon. I wish you peace. :)
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